I do have a confession to make. Though I hate it, it is good for me to be laid low. There I said it. I am a prideful, self-sufficient, bratty, three year old. When I am laid low I have to be dependent on others. It is the only way. I am thankful for it. I must be broken. Pride is a horrible thing. Something I think humans will always struggle with it on this earth.
Anyway, I cannot do much outside the house or chores inside the house on my own now. Or at least without must rest in between. I am pretty dependent. Yet it is in this place that God teaches me the most. It is in this place that God let's me experience the most security, and love in HIM. Strange huh? It is because His kingdom is an upside down kingdom. He is a God who "opposes the proud but is near the humble".
At times we must wait or endure. Like now during my illness I am mostly having to endure. God is giving me enough strength to do the things I must do. But I must be wise. Take note it is the things I must do not things I want to do. Now I must really prioritize. Things do not look the way I may want but God gives me enough strength to accomplish the important. It has given me time to really reevaluate and really talk it over with Him.
Then Sometimes God will give us an immediate yes. It has been a long time since I have experienced this. I am sure it is because I have not been paying attention. When people are able to do most things on their own they really lose sight of God in the little things. But the truth is God is in every detail of our lives. He in control. He loves us that much. Do you stop to pay attention to that?
In the past 24 hours I got three immediate yes answers to prayer that I know of. First I was so very thankful to God that I was in tears that I could make my children PB&J sandwiches. It was a great accomplishment with how tired I have been and with how much pain I have been in. After I had served them my stomach started hurting pretty bad. It was the medicine, apparently I did not have enough on my stomach. But after all I had just done I was too weak to do anything about it. I cried out to God.
Immediately I got a text from a sweet lady. It said, "I am in a hurry I am bringing you lunch now." I was in awe. This is what I needed. Something on my stomach but I was too weak to do it myself. An answer. I ate it and was fine. Now the girls could have done something for me but God really wowed me here.
Next I had a babysitter coming and needed a few items from Walmart. I was fretting a bit because the trip is so much on me and thinking about it makes me nervous. Will I be able to make it? I really need help but I did not know who to call then. I was not sure if I should chance it. It was the same day I was just talking about. It was a hard day in the first place but it was the day the baby sitter was coming. As soon as I posted a prayer request my friend called me and said hey I am going to Walmart can I get you something. I started crying. She said what is wrong? I proceeded to tell her the story. She had no idea. She was off that day from work because it was Veterans day. Amazing. We went together and she helped me. Without her I could not have done it.
The next morning I was very weak but my daughters were invited to a birthday party. I wanted them to be able to go so decided to get the stamina to do it as a whole family. My husband would be there to drive. He is so good to help me. My daughter lost the card which was the present as we were going out the door. She kept searching frantically around the house for it. Then said mom can you please help me find it. I could not. I was too weak so I told her. Honey I cannot help you but God knows where it is we can ask Him. I prayed. He gave me the thought of under the microwave. She looked and it was there. It had slide under somehow. Again an immediate answer. I love when God does that. But we need to acknowledge we need Him. How often do we do that?
We must acknowledge to that even the no answers are good for us. If we believe God is sovereign and in control of all things which I do otherwise what kind of God would we serve? Then we must trust His no in a situation. We must trust the things we do not understand. I know all the horror of Chronic Lyme disease. I know what a miracle it was for Him to heal me 7 years ago from it with such a small amount of treatment. I may not understand why it came back but I do trust He is in control. However it plays out I know that me and my family will be better off for it. So take heart God loves you. He is a loving Father who desires the very best for you and can see the bigger picture. You may not be able to understand but He does. He is good.
No comments:
Post a Comment