Marriage Monday-Submission is a Choice Not a Dirty Word

I just love Marriage Monday! Chrysalis is now hosting this once a month. Go to her blog to check out more and to see what others are saying.

I have to do what? Those were my exact thoughts the first time I read Stormie Omartian's book "The Power of a Praying Wife." I remember it well. An older woman who took interest in us younger married women got us together for Bible study revolving around this book. This idea of submission was foreign to me. What about being the strong independent female? I did not need any man, let alone one that I would have to submit to. What was this nonsense?

The first chapter was incredible. It focused on my heart. Not changing my man but changing me. Are you kidding? Have you met my husband? I am the only proper one to train him, aren't I?

As you can see I got off on a hard start. But I stuck in there with this group (perhaps it was the peer pressure). Little by little God started to change my heart. It began to soften. It became pliable. God did start to change me. Little by little, bit by bit the hardness of heart and pride of self sufficiency chipped away.

Submission is like a dance. If you have ever seen a partner dance then you know there can only be one leader. If they both try to lead they step all over each other and they do not flow. Marriage is much like that. Ephesians 5 tells us to respect our husbands. We need to respect them enough to allow them to lead us in this dance of life. It is their God-given responsibility. They are the ones who are accountable to God for how they lead. Our job is to respect them. We too will be accountable to God for how we respected them. Our men need our support. They are in the hard, cold world every day all day long. They need to know when they come home that they can come to a safe place where they are loved and respected no matter what.

I used to play Holy Spirit to my husband. I thought it was my job to make sure he was doing all things right. Then one day someone told me that I was not my husband's Holy Spirit. I needed to release him to God. It is God's job to do the changing--not mine. I will never forget those words. When I actually followed through in this way, God did amazing things. My husband did start to change. I have to tell you as soon as I got out of the way, God moved in mighty ways.

I am happy to say it is a joy to submit to my man. It was not always that way though but now I know how to trust God. My man is a gift to me. A God-given gift. God only gives good gifts. So I trust God enough to trust the man he gave me. My sweet man always asks my opinion which is part of the dance. He also makes mistakes and wrong choices. But God uses those to grow us and move us and keep us paired perfectly in this dance of life. Somethings may need more training than others but I love every moment of it-the good and the bad. And what a parallel this is to our dance with God. I love the great mystery of it all.