I received a copy of this book free from Bethany Publishers for the purpose of an honest review.
No More Christian Nice Girl: When Just Being Nice--Instead of Good--Hurts You, Your Family, and Your Friends was a good read. It is a problem that I encounter at times within myself and with others around me. I grew up in the north so I did not see this nice versus good as much of an issue there. However now in the south I do see it occur more often. I think culturally the southern sweetness is in this category at times. Nice is not good however when we lie.
Lying was the biggest thing I got from this book. Though there is so much helpful information for someone who seems to have problems saying no or defining clear boundaries for themselves, I realized that there are some things that I do that are actual lies. An example of this is saying yes to something when really I want to say no. My children are the ones who usually suffer when I do this. They beg for things and instead of saying no many times I cross the boundary I set in my mind and say yes. Then I feel resentment toward them because of this. Standing firm with the boundaries you set is important. I am not sure why these little people in my life can push me around. I have seen this and have been convicted to stand firm now. So, ask me how I am doing when you get a chance. This book looks at our boundaries with friends, workplace, family, etc.
I really liked how it also explored good women of the Bible and the balance of speaking truth in love. When we do not do this we are lying. If we love people we will tell them the truth. Sometimes this is hard but it is what we need to do. Nice people avoid conflict or turn the other way but good people (true loving people) will have confrontation where it is necessary.
One thing I wish we had more of in this book was talk about Jesus and His being well rounded with boundaries and attitude. There is a section in the back with all the Scripture references to Jesus and how He had appropriate boundaries however I wish the book took more time to speak on this.
Overall this book was a good read. If you know someone or you personally have issues with being nice instead of being good this book will give you much freedom in Christ.
To purchase a copy of this book from Amazon.com click on the link above.*
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Monday, August 23, 2010
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2 comments:
thanks for this review. seth has the guy version and it has a very attractive cover so we have held on to it even though we didn't know what was inside. i am guessing it will be similar. :) sounds like something you were telling me recently about southern sweetness. :)
love you!
This sounds like a wonderful book and thanks for the review. I do have this problem, not horribly, but I do tend to say 'yes' to things even though my mind is screaming 'no! no! no!' I will look into this book further. I'm building a stash of information on this and was recently introduced to "Principle Centered Living" by Rev. Dr. Sheldon E. Williams - 9 Reasons to Maintain Your Values in a Pressure-Filled World. Here is the website It's been such an informative and enlightening read, as navigating decisions and 'what should I do?' in today's world can get very choppy. We certainly negate ourselves when we are too 'nice' and also when we act in a way that goes against our principles. I think the book you reviewed, and this book I've been perusing, would make an excellent duo for helping to make proper decisions and resulting in proper action. Thank you.
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