When a Family Prays Together

This new year's eve our family tried something new. It was decided by my husband that we would all take time to pray for one another and the upcoming new year. We are a family, so we see the most of one another in our best and our worst. This means we have eyes to see the things that we most need help with. I expected this to be a short exercise but as each person took their turn to pray very personally and intimately about the other family members it ended up being almost an hour long ordeal.

This was the most beautiful thing I have seen in 2015. It was busting with love, confession, and grace. We were honest and real with our struggles and desire for more grace to change more into Christ likeness. Forgiveness was sought; humility reigned. There were things I didn't even realize others knew about themselves that were revealed. And the most beautiful thing was that we can help one another by our prayers.

"You also must help us by prayer, so that many will give thanks on our behalf for the blessing granted us through the prayers of many." ~2 Corinthians 1:11

What if we just took the time to do this on a more regular basis? Hearts would change toward one another. God would move in bigger ways in our hearts. We would be more focused on Him. This is an activity I hope we engage in more often but instead of just focusing prayer on our family that we expand it out to praying for others. Maybe monthly a topic could be given and we would prepare our prayers around that? It is a great start in lessons on dependence on God and I am so thankful for that moving experience.

I hope this new year is a more prayerful year because prayer instills dependence and intimacy with God more naturally in our hearts which is an opportunity for more growth in grace. And I am thankful that "he gives more grace" because I am learning to splash around in it more and more. 

A Good Story Involves Conflict - How to Develop a Good Character God's Way

From almost the moment of conception I have prayed that my girls would be women who would have gentle and quiet spirits from 1 Peter 3:4 and obedient hearts. Also that they would love the word of God more than life itself. Lofty prayers. But God loves us so much that He delights in these kind of prayers. He answers these kinds of prayers. These are the prayers that are His will and are according to His Scripture.

If He tells us, "Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God" (1 Peter 1:3-4). Then He means this. This is His desire for us. So this is a prayer that will be answered.

However, in our fast food, microwave it please culture I just assumed that my children would pop out of my womb with this quality. Yet that is not how character development happens. God is writing an amazing story through our lives. And the Holy Spirit must work this kind of meekness of spirit into us. It is not something we can do on our own. It takes training. We must receive this training but He works it. So how does He train us in meekness? As I was reading, "As Silver Refined" by Kay Arthur this paragraph really struck me about meekness.

It states, "Meekness is born in stress, in trials, in affliction, in conflict...in difficulties. Meekness is born in situations that humble you. This meekness that God so highly values in your life will show itself--prove itself--in oppression and pressure and disappointment. It is true for God's people Israel, and it's true for you and me."

Now that is a powerful statement. Meekness in our character is a process. My prayers are being answered through the difficulties we experience. My chronic illness gives my children a chance to humble themselves by having a weak mom when others do not. They are denied many activities others are not. We are dealing with special needs in our house with requires much more patience and understanding. I could go on and on about the opportunity for trials we experience daily. They are opportunity to develop beautiful young ladies answering my prayers.

Now obedience is also learned in a funny way. It is learned through suffering...Hebrews 5:8 states about Jesus, "Even though Jesus was God’s Son, he learned obedience from the things he suffered." Now if Jesus Himself humbled Himself completely and had to learn obedience this way why would be exempt? Look at your sufferings in whatever form as opportunities for a good story. Live your story well. Let your character develop fully into what God is making it into. He sees the end. And it is good. Very good. Don't pray what you are not serious about. You may just get what you asked for. But I can tell you I do not regret a thing. Developing in an exciting story as crazy as it is is worth it if we are becoming more and more like Him in the process. 

Lastly...As we suffer through trials it does drive us into the Word of God. It drives us into the Father's arms. So as we walk through these hard things a natural by product is cherishing and loving His word as we come to know and love HIM. Would love your thoughts on this. Has it changed your perspective?

Answered Prayers

***Please excuse any typos because my eyes are not at their best right now.

I do have a confession to make. Though I hate it, it is good for me to be laid low. There I said it. I am a prideful, self-sufficient, bratty, three year old. When I am laid low I have to be dependent on others. It is the only way. I am thankful for it. I must be broken. Pride is a horrible thing. Something I think humans will always struggle with it on this earth.

Anyway, I cannot do much outside the house or chores inside the house on my own now. Or at least without must rest in between. I am pretty dependent. Yet it is in this place that God teaches me the most. It is in this place that God let's me experience the most security, and love in HIM. Strange huh? It is because His kingdom is an upside down kingdom. He is a God who "opposes the proud but is near the humble".

I know that God hears me. I know He hears every prayer I utter. I know this because we are in relationship. And in relationship God listens. He really listens to us. Sometimes He says no to our requests. Honestly this is for our protection. When your three year old asks to drive the car do you let them? God can see the bigger picture and it is good for Him to say no to us.

At times we must wait or endure. Like now during my illness I am mostly having to endure. God is giving me enough strength to do the things I must do. But I must be wise. Take note it is the things I must do not things I want to do. Now I must really prioritize. Things do not look the way I may want but God gives me enough strength to accomplish the important. It has given me time to really reevaluate and really talk it over with Him.

Then Sometimes God will give us an immediate yes. It has been a long time since I have experienced this. I am sure it is because I have not been paying attention. When people are able to do most things on their own they really lose sight of God in the little things. But the truth is God is in every detail of our lives. He in control. He loves us that much. Do you stop to pay attention to that?

In the past 24 hours I got three immediate yes answers to prayer that I know of. First I was so very thankful to God that I was in tears that I could make my children PB&J sandwiches. It was a great accomplishment with how tired I have been and with how much pain I have been in. After I had served them my stomach started hurting pretty bad. It was the medicine, apparently I did not have enough on my stomach. But after all I had just done I was too weak to do anything about it. I cried out to God.

Immediately I got a text from a sweet lady. It said, "I am in a hurry I am bringing you lunch now." I was in awe. This is what I needed. Something on my stomach but I was too weak to do it myself. An answer. I ate it and was fine. Now the girls could have done something for me but God really wowed me here.

Next I had a babysitter coming and needed a few items from Walmart. I was fretting a bit because the trip is so much on me and thinking about it makes me nervous. Will I be able to make it? I really need help but I did not know who to call then. I was not sure if I should chance it. It was the same day I was just talking about. It was a hard day in the first place but it was the day the baby sitter was coming. As soon as I posted a prayer request my friend called me and said hey I am going to Walmart can I get you something. I started crying. She said what is wrong? I proceeded to tell her the story. She had no idea. She was off that day from work because it was Veterans day. Amazing. We went together and she helped me. Without her I could not have done it.

The next morning I was very weak but my daughters were invited to a birthday party. I wanted them to be able to go so decided to get the stamina to do it as a whole family. My husband would be there to drive. He is so good to help me. My daughter lost the card which was the present as we were going out the door. She kept searching frantically around the house for it. Then said mom can you please help me find it. I could not. I was too weak so I told her. Honey I cannot help you but God knows where it is we can ask Him. I prayed. He gave me the thought of under the microwave. She looked and it was there. It had slide under somehow. Again an immediate answer. I love when God does that. But we need to acknowledge we need Him. How often do we do that?

We must acknowledge to that even the no answers are good for us. If we believe God is sovereign and in control of all things which I do otherwise what kind of God would we serve? Then we must trust His no in a situation. We must trust the things we do not understand. I know all the horror of Chronic Lyme disease. I know what a miracle it was for Him to heal me 7 years ago from it with such a small amount of treatment. I may not understand why it came back but I do trust He is in control. However it plays out I know that me and my family will be better off for it. So take heart God loves you. He is a loving Father who desires the very best for you and can see the bigger picture. You may not be able to understand but He does. He is good.

A Small Study on Prayer - Part Six

So much can be said on prayer but this post wraps up this study. I will continue to write on the subject as God teaches me new things but for this little study. This will be it.

^"He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and He will deliver us again. On Him we have set our hope that He will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many."
~2 Corinthians 1:10-11

Now these verses just amazingly address the power of prayer. God had delivered Paul from some crazy horrible things. Part of that deliverance came because people helped with prayers for him. How wonderful is that? If you ever need a passage to remind yourself that your prayers matter, memorize this one.

We must pray as God leads because when we do things happen. I do not know why God works alongside us in this way. He does not need us. He is all powerful. I think it is just part of His love for us and His desire for intimacy with us.

So believer, know prayer is a gift, privilege, and responsibility. Do it as God leads. It matters. We should be thankful for that.

A Small Study on Prayer - Part Five

"He went and took the scroll from the right hand of him who sat on the throne. And when he had taken it, the four living creatures and the twenty-four elders fell down before the Lamb. Each one had a harp and they were holding golden bowls full of incense, which are the prayers of God’s people."
~Revelation 5:7-9

These passages are speaking of the very throne of God! Before Him are these four living creatures that continually worship Him. They are holding golden bowls filled with incense. What is the incense? It is the prayers of the saints! It is every prayer spoken by you and I. Isn't that amazing?

In the Old Testament tabernacle the priests would burn incense before the throne and this was just a shadow of this picture we see in Revelation. Here is what is said in Exodus about this incense.

"Put the altar in front of the curtain that shields the ark of the covenant law—before the atonement cover that is over the tablets of the covenant law—where I will meet with you.“Aaron must burn fragrant incense on the altar every morning when he tends the lamps. He must burn incense again when he lights the lamps at twilight so incense will burn regularly before the LORD for the generations to come."
~Exodus 30:6-8

There was an altar of incense that was placed in front of the curtain that separated the holy place from the most holy place. God's presence was behind the curtain. No one was allowed in there except the chosen priest once a year. God however required the priests to keep this incense burning regularly. For us today that is a reference to praying continually since the bowls of incense before Him in Heaven are the prayers of the saints.

That means like incense that burned before God our prayers are fragrant offerings to God. Isn't that amazing? And that curtain that separated anyone from coming into God's presence (in the temple) was torn in two when Jesus died on the cross. Jesus opened a way for us to come boldly into the presence of God (Hebrews 4:16). And even better so He gave us the Holy Spirit who is the very living breathing God to live within us. That is some amazing stuff! What an amazing gift we have to come before Him in prayer. So why do we not use that gift as often as we should?

Thoughts?

Father, give us ears to hear You, help us desire to pray continually. Help us to grow in you. We are amazed by You and Your greatness. We are in awe of You ways. Thank You for making a way for us. In Jesus Name. Amen.

A Small Study on Prayer - Part Four

"I urge, then, first of all, that petitions, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for all people—  for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness. This is good, and pleases God our Savior"
~1 Timothy 2:1-3

In these verses I love that prayer is described as something that pleases God. And it is to be made for ALL people. It is an urgent request because it is important. It effects how we live. The verse goes on to state the reason for these prayers, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness. Isn't that worth taking the time out to pray for?

Also, do not forget to pray for your leaders. They are the ones who make the decisions. They are the ones who God has put in place to do that. Pray for them continually because it effects things greatly. Do you believe this? And above all I want to please God. In these verses it says it pleases Him.

A Small Study of Prayer - Part Three

"Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
~1 Thessalonians 5:16-18


"Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful."
~ Colossians 4:2

Ever wonder what God's will is for you? Well simply put in 1 Thessalonians listed above it says, to rejoice (when?) ALWAYS, pray (when?) CONTINUALLY, give thanks (when?) IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES.

Now that is easier to say than do. It is an act of the will sometimes to be these things. But when we keep our eyes on Jesus and behold Him He will make this possible. We must keep Him forever at the center of our thoughts and hearts. When He is this will be our desire.

It is my thought that anytime we feel a distance between ourselves and God it is because He is not our center. I have found this to be the truth each time in my own life. Sometimes I have to fiercely fight to keep Him the center and other times it comes more naturally. That is just how life works. It is like this for all of us.

These verses sum it up well. Hebrews 12:1-3, " ¹ Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, ² fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. ³ Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."

Do you have any examples of taking your eyes off Jesus and How God brought you back to Him?

A Small Study on Prayer - Part Two

“I looked for someone among them who would build up the wall and stand before me in the gap on behalf of the land so I would not have to destroy it, but I found no one. So I will pour out my wrath on them and consume them with my fiery anger, bringing down on their own heads all they have done, declares the Sovereign LORD.”
~Ezekial 22:30-31

The book of Ezekial is the most interestingly strange book I have read. I love it but have a hard time understanding a lot of it. I like to read Scripture and ask God to help me understand. Sometimes His answer to me is wait. So I read it again and again and the Spirit will give me a little more understanding then a little more. It is a process.

However, this passage speaks for itself. It speaks of the utter urgency and importance of prayer. And at times He has shown me my lack of prayer and how consequences arise from that. God was searching for someone who would pray. Someone who would intercede on behalf of someone else. But He found NO ONE! That makes my heart weep. He found NO ONE!

During this process of seeing this own sin in my heart this could have very well been me. One of the NO ONES because He searched and called but I ignored it. Oh Lord, please help me not fall into this again. You see prayer changes things. It effects things. It moves things. It is important.

We must slow down in the quiet so we can really hear. We need to have stillness so we can just sit quietly before God. He wants to speak to us. He has given us an amazing book, the Bible that is poured out with His words. We need to focus on it, ponder it, meditate on it.

What suggestions do you have for practicing stillness? How do you do this?

A Small Study on Prayer - Part One

^"As for me, far be it from me that I should sin against the LORD by failing to pray for you." 
~1 Samuel 12:23

In this passage of Scripture, Israel had asked for a king. God was suppose to be their King. However, they wanted an earthly king like everyone around them had. God decided to give them what they wanted. Samuel was the leader of the people at the time and their prophet. He is the one who says the verse above.

The point is, we are to pray for one another. God made us one body of believers that He loves. If any part of the body suffers it all suffers. In my post yesterday, I talked about people gossiping about me. I was angry and hurt and I said in my heart, fine I will simply not pray for them anymore.

This is sin. Just because someone is not acting the way you desire is not a reason to stop praying. Really they need the prayer even more because God is the only one who can move and change hearts. Samuel knew this simple truth. He knew to stop praying would be sin.

Have you ever fallen into the sin of prayerlessness? How did it happen? How did God bring you out of it? Do you need prayer for anything now? Please share, would love to hear your stories.

The Sin of Prayerlessness - Stronghold Exposed

God has brought me through so much. I am so thankful for it all. However, it took a wonderful mentor of mine to pinpoint some very important words that would be used by God to make a huge breakthrough in my life. Dee Brestin is doing a wonderful Bible study on her blog. The post was called, What Turns our Hearts to Stone. 

This is what was said,

What Satan wants to do is cause “attachment disorder” between you and your heavenly Father.
“Attachment disorder” occurs when the person who should have protected you hurts you.

You see, I used to have an amazing amount of faith in prayer. I would pray for things that others would probably play it safe on. I experienced the joy of seeing prayer after prayer answered the way I prayed. It was amazing. I felt super confident in God and in my prayers. I do think we are all to pray but I think that prayer is a spiritual gift as well. It is a helps gift and is very important. 2 Corinthians 1:11a states, "You also must help us by prayer." I think because of that it just comes easier to some. This was what was happening with me.  And it had nothing to do with me only the grace given by God.

Like the gift of teaching, it will be a joy and come easy for the teacher. Serving, will happen with joy and come easy for the one with the gift of service. Prayer as a spiritual gift will come easily and with great joy. A spiritual gift is a grace given to you by the Holy Spirit. Generally it is a great joy to operate in your gifts. It is something that just comes naturally though it can be improved with practice over time as we grow.


With that said, all are called to pray, all are called to preach the gospel to the world, and all are called to serve one another. God uses the body with each individual using their God given grace gifts to help it grow and mature. This is to edify the body of Christ nothing else. It is not something you use for personal gain that you withhold from others. A spiritual gift is to be shared and used to serve others. When we each operate in our gifts we strengthen the body of Christ and keep it healthy. When we don't use our gifts we are not keeping the body healthy. Each one plays an important part. This must be taken seriously. 


We cannot simply state that our part is not needed. We must know that when we fail to operate in our gifting it effects the entire body. It is also operating in disobedience. Often I am tempted to feel that this helps gift of intercession is insignificant. I cannot measure it for results like one would who might be gifted in hospitality and sees immediate joy because they opened their home to someone.

However over time my heart started to shift. I liked being known as the one you wanted praying for you. I started seeing God as the gift giver instead of God alone. I was going after God because of what He did not just because of who He was. This was a painful truth to be confronted with. And it happened when I prayed one of those put your self out there kind of prayers.

When God didn't answer this particular prayer it devastated me. To make matters worse people started gossiping about it. I felt like I stepped out there for God and He let me fall. So because of this satan planted some lies I believed and embraced in my head then in my heart. I formed attachment disorder with God. I thought I could not trust Him. This is where the problem took place.

God has worked so much in my life since then but I still find myself being "safe" because I cannot bear to just let go and trust God fully. He is showing me that I can and this is where healing is taking place. This also is where this need for approval I spoke of earlier took root. 


I am so thankful that He shows us things in our hearts and desires us to be fully His. Our hearts are deceitful and we often do not even know what is in them but God knows. He always knows and He loves us enough to not allow it to stay in our hearts to rot. He will show us as we seek Him and help us work it out. The pain we feel He feels alongside us. He is safe though not controlled by us. He can be trusted fully but His ways are not our ways. We just have to trust who He is and that He knows best.


This has been a very vulnerable post in my struggle with prayer over these past few years. I still pray but it is nothing like it was in the past. I am coming back to that. In obedience I am listening now. I want to stay here. He delights in our prayers. The next couple posts will be a Bible study about prayer. Hope you will enjoy them and grow yourself in prayer.

compassion bloggers

This is Bereket. She is from Ethiopia, Africa. She is my Compassion child. A trip is scheduled to visit her May 2011. The cost is $4000.00. There is no way I could afford this trip but Gods resources are limitless. I submitted my blog for consideration for being a blogger for Compassion. It would be an amazing adventure of a lifetime. It is in Gods hands.

Do you sponsor a Compassion child? Tell me about them.

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Random Frustrations

Friendships can be incredibly hard at times. I have some friends who seem more “spiritual” because they never give you a direct answer to a question as simple as, “can you help me out with this?” I get that we need to speak to God about everything we do. But to me that seems to be more of a pray without ceasing kind of issue.

If we are truly praying without ceasing (1 Thessalonians 5:17) and have the mind of Christ (1 Corinthians 2:16) like Scripture states then shouldn’t we be able to get a sense by the Holy Spirit (who lives within us in power) to a simple question like that? God usually just gives me a peace about some things and uneasiness about others. Yet still my feelings about something can betray me. Sometimes it is just doing something by faith because after all everything that does not come from faith is sin (Romans 14:23). Hoping this can still be applied though it is used in a different context here.

Sometimes I just don’t know how to respond to this behavior. There are times that it takes so long for an answer to come that I think it is just procrastination. Let us just let our yes be yes and our no be no (James 5:12). It can be that simple. However, I think we try to complicate things by thinking too hard. I am preaching to the choir when I say this because I am saying it as much to myself.

We can get into wrong motives in our decisions so that is a good time to sit with God and let Him search our hearts. We sometimes need to see the why or why not of situations. Like, do I not want to do this because I am being selfish? Or do I want to do this because it will make me look good? So many heart questions to address here. Also, sometimes we just need to say no because we are stretching ourselves thin. But we should know that and feel confident enough in our Lord to say no when this situation arises.

We also have been given certain gifts and abilities so serving in those areas should be first and foremost. The areas that bring God the most glory. For instance today I was at the grocery store. There was an elderly couple in front of me who did not have enough money for their remaining groceries. I overheard this conversation; I eyed the amount of groceries in their cart and knew that I could cover that expense. I offered to pay for the remaining. Now, as this was going on my only motivation that I am aware of is Christ. I want to bring glory to Him. His Word talks of helping those in distress and the poor. So to me this was a no brainer. God provided the finances for this and it was in line with His Word so I responded. (The couple did not receive this help but that is another story.)

I believe whole heartedly that God speaks to us. He communicates to us regularly because He lives in us. He is always accessible. The problems come when we do not listen or try to take things on ourselves. It is not that hard to just sit with Him and know what the right thing is to do. We have the Scriptures, we have His Spirit. It is and can be that simple. Unfortunately sin complicates things. Mostly that sin comes in the form of selfishness. So what do we do? Agree to encourage one another in the truth of His word and speak to one another in the truth of His word. Be honest, peace-loving, pure, and love one another with a pure heart. I may be overly simplistic but this one relationship with Christ is one that is not supposed to be that hard. Let us keep our eyes fixed on Him the author and perfecter of our faith who for the joy set before Him endured the cross scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God (Hebrews 12:2).

Marriage Monday - Prayer in Marriage

I have to tell you that prayer saved our marriage. When I married my husband I was a believer but severely immature and malnourished. On the outside we looked the same but I had the Holy Spirit in me and he did not. How do I know this? In our sin I was miserable but he was not. That does not make a good pair and started us out on a rocky place. It is only by God's grace and prayer that our marriage is in tact and praise His name, thriving.

God began working in my heart and showing me where I needed to start living for Him. Through books like, The Power of a Praying Wife and strong believers I was finally growing and starting to look more like Jesus.

I first started to nag at my husband about the things I wanted changed. I would pout, plead, nag, beg, yell, scream, manipulate, and throw tantrums. As you can imagine this did not work. It is a wonder we survived. As God started showing me where my heart needed to change I slowly submitted to Him. I started to slowly entrust my husband to Him. I started to take things to prayer and nag less. God started changing things. Slowly but changes were happening many of which had to start first within my own heart.

God used this change as His word talks about in 1 Peter 3 to have my husband start to take notice. He then realized that he did not know the Lord and he desired to know Him the way I knew Him. God allowed us to pray together for my man to receive the Lord. That was a precious thing and a gift of grace.

That was almost ten years ago. I am humbled to say my man is the leader of our home and a godly man. He is a great example of God's unconditional love to me. I praise God for all he has done. Most all of it I know was accomplished through prayer, if not all. Prayer is the ground work that changes things. It moves mountains. Prayer saved our marriage and I am so thankful to God for that precious gift.

To see what others are saying about prayer and marriage or join in go here.

VOM - Please pray for Asia Bibi and her family

Please pray for a fellow sister in Christ. Join by going to www.be-a-voice.net.

Asia Bibi, a 37-year-old Pakistani woman from the village of Ittanwali, was arrested by police on Friday, June 19, and faces possible blasphemy charges. Asia is the wife of 50-year-old Ashiq Masih, and their family is one of only three Christian families in a village of more than 1,500 families.

Many of the local women work on the farm of Muslim landowner Muhammad Idrees, including Asia. During their work many of the Muslim women have pressured Asia to renounce Christianity and accept Islam. In June, the pressure became especially strong.

On Friday, June 19, there was an intense discussion among the women about their faith, with the Muslim women telling Asia about Islam. Asia responded by telling them about her faith in Christ. Asia told the Muslim women Christ had died on the cross for our sins, then asked them what Mohammed had done for them, according to VOM sources. She told them Jesus is alive, but Mohammed is dead. “Our Christ is the true prophet of God,” she reportedly told them, “and yours is not true.”

Upon hearing this response the Muslim women became angry and began to beat Asia Bibi. Then some men came and took her and locked her in a room. They announced from mosque loudspeakers that she would be punished by having her face blackened and being paraded through the village on a donkey. Local Christians informed the police, who took Asia into custody before the Muslims could carry out their plan. She is currently being held at the police station in Nankana city. Christians there urged the police not to file blasphemy charges, but police claimed that they must go forward due to pressure from local Muslim leaders.

The Voice of the Martyrs urges Christians around the world to pray for Asia Bibi and her family. Further, we call on the Pakistani government to insure that the rights of Christians like Asia are protected.

God Confides in Me?

Then the LORD said, "Shall I hide from Abraham what I am about to do?
~Genesis 18:17

Ponder that question? God came from Heaven with two other men to personally visit Abraham.
The purpose of this visit in the earlier verses was so that they could deliver the news that Abraham and Sarah were to have the child God promised this time next year.

What a personal God we serve! First He didn't have to deliver the news that way. He already told Abraham about 25 years ago when he made a covenant with him. Of course along the way and with too much waiting Sarah told Abraham to take her maidservant and have a child through her. That was not God's plan. They tried to rush it.

I like how normal Sarah and Abraham were. Don't we after all try to rush God as well. He has given us many promises and sometimes we think if we just help Him a bit then it will come to pass in our time frame. God is God. He doesn't need our help or us at all to accomplish anything. Yet the high honor is the He chooses to.

He delights in allowing us to partner with Him in His work. He delights in the personal relationship where He personally shares things with us. He delights in this. He created us for Himself. We are His children and what good-willed Father would not want to enjoy relationship their children?

Verse 17 above is God saying that He wanted to share His work with Abraham. He wanted to tell him what He was up to in the world. I am so baffled by that. God wants to share the things He is up to with us. Here is another verse I like regarding this then I want to get back to the amazing text on intercession.

The LORD confides in those who fear him; he makes his covenant known to them.
~Psalm 25:14

The word for confides in the Hebrew text connotes the term in a way that a person would speak to a friend. I LOVE that. God as our Friend confides in those who fear Him. I believe Abraham had a great healthy fear of God. Was Abraham perfect? By no means. God is looking to people whose hearts are inclined toward Him. Abraham was one of those. He also feared God. The word for fear is simply the fact that we are so in awe of God. He could swish up like a bug but instead He chooses to make us His friend. It doesn't get anymore amazing than that. The God who places each star in place and tells the ocean where to stop. The God of all Creation. The God who raised Jesus from the dead wants to confine in us. He wants to be our Friend. Now that is something to really rejoice about.

Here is some more of the reason that God chose to share with Abraham.

¹⁸ Abraham will surely become a great and powerful nation, and all nations on earth will be blessed through him. ¹⁹ For I have chosen him, so that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD by doing what is right and just, so that the LORD will bring about for Abraham what he has promised him."
~Genesis 18:18-19

God knows the plans He has for us. It was through Abraham (and Jesus of course) that we became a part of this line of people. Galatians 3:29 says, "If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham's seed, and heirs according to the promise." So because of this he is part of our heritage and the blessings that come with it are also ours in a spiritual sense.

Then God tells Abraham the problem.

Then the LORD said, "The outcry against Sodom and Gomorrah is so great and their sin so grievous that I will go down and see if what they have done is as bad as the outcry that has reached me. If not, I will know." ~Genesis 18:20-21

Why would God tell Abraham something so hard to hear? Why would He chose to share this with Abraham? Abraham wasn't the first man God shared hard things like this with. Psalm 106:23 tells us where Moses also plead before God about the people. So we see Abraham respond in a similar way.

Then Abraham approached him and said: "Will you sweep away the righteous with the wicked? What if there are fifty righteous people in the city? Will you really sweep it away and not spare the place for the sake of the fifty righteous people in it? Far be it from you to do such a thing—to kill the righteous with the wicked, treating the righteous and the wicked alike. Far be it from you! Will not the Judge of all the earth do right?"

The LORD said, "If I find fifty righteous people in the city of Sodom, I will spare the whole place for their sake."
~Genesis 18:23-26

Abraham is amazing to me. He knew God's heart. He knew He could approach God and ask Him questions about His ways. Abraham could not understand God's ways much like us. God's ways are God's ways, our minds are not like His to understand. Plus we do not see the entire picture that God does. But God loves our respectful questions. It is how we get to know Him better. To know His true heart. What bold question Abraham asked as well, "Will not the Judge of the earth do right?" Wow. That is a bold question. But I know he asked it in respect because he did not understand God's way.

I love God's response to Abraham. He did not have to change anything but for the sake of his intercession God does. Think on that for a second. Because Abraham stood in the gap for the city, God ceased to destroy it so quickly. God listened to Abraham and He did not have to. Yet He delighted in Abraham and His heart.

The rest of the passage Abraham continues to ask God about a smaller number of people by fives all the way until he gets to only 10 being left. God agrees in each request to not destroy it. When you read those remaining passages you get an even better glimpse of Abraham's heart and great fear of the Lord. At each new question he says, "though I am nothing but dust and ashes, what if" (v.27), and "may the Lord not be angry" (vv.30,32).

The last number they come to is if there are 10 righteous people left in the city it will not be destroyed. God is so good and merciful. We must understand thought that His ways are bigger than our ways. As it goes, the city was destroyed so there had to be less than 10 righteous there. I love though how God allowed Abraham to speak with Him and intercede for the people. It is an amazing privilege.

What people has God allowed you the privilege to lift before His throne?

Do you ever sense God sharing something with you that you know you need to bring before His throne? Ever been woken up in the middle of the night with someone on your mind? Pay attention to these cues, God may want to share something with you so you can stand in the gap in prayer for the person.

Walk It Out

As Christians we have the power of Christ living in us. His Spirit full of all the same power that God used to raise Christ from the dead lives in our bodies. That overwhelms me. God's goodness in that is just too much for me to wrap my brain around. It is too much. Too amazing. But I accept it.

With the Spirit of God living in us we need to learn to walk in Him. That means completely surrendering our wants, wills, and desires to Him. Dying completely to ourselves and living completely for Him.

The fruit of the Spirit consists of love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, kindness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control. All that is inside of us through the Spirit of the living God within us. It is what we should be able to walk out daily submitted to Him.

Now walking this thing out in surrender is not so hard when things are going well. Sure we can easily walk it out when things go our way. However, how do you walk in the Spirit when you are in excruciating pain? Isn't it justifiable to be grumpy, mean, and hateful? Maybe impatient or demanding? Wouldn't it be fair to act that way when we feel so bad?

The answer to all of those questions is no. If we truly desire to walk in the Spirit then we need to let God teach us to walk this thing out in the difficult times. That is where true maturity is formed. That is how we become mature and complete in Him. That is how He shines brightly through us most. It is easy to walk these things out when life is good. When things are bad however it is not so easy.

This is where I am right now. God is teaching me how to surrender all my pain to Him. He is teaching me a deeper level of walking this life out in His Spirit completely surrendered to Him. After all that is what I desire. That is what I want. Too look more and more like Him day by day.

I wish I could tell you that I am getting a perfect score in this school of walking in the Spirit. I am not! I lose it with the kids, lacking patience. I grumble because I am tired of feeling horrible all the time. I doubt God's faithfulness because He won't just give this girl a break? I lose self-control because I am so angry and frustrated with feeling like I cannot do anything anymore.

I fail often but that is how we best learn. We fall down but we get back up again with God's help. He sharpens us and we learn and grow each time. So if you find yourself in some sort of trial, walk it out in the Spirit. It brings the most honor to God that way. Let Him teach you how to walk it out and do not beat yourself up when you fail at it. His grace is amazing and in this classroom of life we are becoming more and more like Him through these lessons.

Exposed

Today I was exposed. I was exposed of something I despise. My weakness. It is not like I try to hide it so much, I am open about it if I am asked about it. I just like to live like it really does not exist. Like it is not really there.

If we are all honest with ourselves I suppose many of us live that way. There is a thing in our lives that we do not want to be known for. Something we are not proud of. That thing that we do not want to be labeled.

Well, mine is and forever will be physical weakness. My body is weird and I could be on mystery diagnosis lots of episodes. No, I am not a hypochondriac. It is just part of how God made me. That is unless the Lord decides to do something otherwise with it, which I pray for everyday. Yet so far His answer has been no. I am fearfully and wonderfully made regardless.

We are at a new place now with new people. It is very hard for me to make friends because I am not a person who finds common conversation easy. I am the one who would rather sit quietly and listen to God and pray for each person in my eye sight. I am very fine with that except God is showing me that we are made for community. I need to make new friends. And this is struggle for me.

Talk to me about what God is doing in your life or ask me what He is doing in mine. Talk to me about the deeper issues of life and I am good. Yet, the surface stuff is what I am horrible at. It makes me completely awkward in making new friendships and makes me look a little snobby. Not only is this hard enough but then the thing I despise in my life shows up already, I do not want to be labeled it. I am not that. I am a child of the Most High God and a child of the light.

So I am exposing my ongoing struggle to the light. I struggle most daily with my health in someway or another. Some problems doctors figure out and some they do not. I have seen so many miracles in my body that I cannot even count them any longer. I know very personally that God is the God who Heals. He has a dozen or more times to me alone. Yet, these mysteries of weakness and weirdness persist. There is nothing that anyone can do about it but God Himself. So, far He chooses not to take it away completely.

As much pain it causes me and my family, we still chose to trust Him. He has a purpose. He is my King and Lord. It is Him I follow. I only pray it keeps me completely dependant on Him and makes me look more and more like Him as my true heart is exposed.

Today was a day of many tears. My stupid pride is there wanting to portray me as someone normal. I am not that. I never will be. Please do not judge me either if you are one who thinks that I just don't have enough faith or too much sin in my life for God to do anything. That is not how God works. I cannot name and claim anything. God is not my genie He is my LORD and Master. He does and allows what is best for me. I am not arrogant enough to decide what is best for me that is His job. Believe me I have more faith than I ever thought I would to even survive this far. As far as sin goes, I have looked under every rock and crevice. Everything exposed has been confessed. God has covered me with His blood therefore I am clean of all things past, present, and future.

I am just a girl at the mercy of a loving God. If my life best suites His glory in this way then so be it. I have never had nor ever will be loved the way I am with Him. I suppose I would not know some of that if it wasn't for the fire we have had to walk through together hand in hand quite often. And having been through stuff we have grown in love so deep together. His has always been there but mine is growing to match what He has for me until I get to be with Him forever in our Home.

So if you find yourself in my boat. Please be encouraged. These trials are temporary. There is a great glory to come. And it is great evidence of the great love that God has for you. He will never leave you or forsake you my friend, no matter what. Nothing can snatch you out of His loving hand-NOTHING.

The Day My Heart Broke-One of My Greatest Hurts

I was hurt. Really hurt. I did not realize something so small could have crushed me in such a big way. We were returning from our annual retreat several years ago with our college group. We were being transferred in a school bus. On the way back we lose the air conditioning.

I find myself holding a child who has contracted hand, foot, and mouth disease that is feverish. The other child is sweating profusely. Students in the back are very hot, especially the ones sitting over the engine. We were in a very tense situation ourselves.

In the back of the bus grumbling started to rise up. You need to know that at the retreat, God did such great things in each person’s life. There was a new unity and new commitments to follow hard after Christ.

Now it seemed as what ground we had gained was slipping fast. Something within me stirred so strong. I jumped up to my feet and said, “NO! We are not going out like this! We are going to pray over this air conditioner and we are not going to complain. The enemy will not steal the ground that we gained while we were away. He will not have it!” I proceeded to tell them to lay hands on this air conditioner. I prayed a come back Jesus sort of prayer over this thing and I knew it would start right back up. After all God had always seemed to answer most of my prayers the way I prayed.

This not what happened.

I told the students to start singing praise songs to God. They started playing and singing. I took back my seat and wept. I think I wept for several hours. The air did not start working again. Why did God not answer this prayer? What will the students think of me? Most importantly, what will they think of God? Did I hear Him right? It was not my normal practice to pray over air conditioners. Did I let Him down somehow? Did I pray wrong?

I could not understand why God left me hanging out there like that. It took me months to recover from this moment. I am not sure why it took so long but it devastated me. It hurt my relationship with the One who I trusted so much.

God keeps reminding me not to worry about it. He keeps reminding me that I have no idea what He did in that instance. I just needed to trust.

God hears all our prayers. I believe He answers each one too. Maybe the answer was no that time. Maybe it was wait. I have no clue what God is doing in the lives of the others who experienced it.

I will tell you what I do know now.

I do not have a time in my life that I can remember not talking to God. Though no one really explained it to me it seemed to be a very natural thing. When hurts came my way God would draw me away to a quiet place and I would pour my heart out to Him. It was natural. It was a gift.

With that gift I had become spoiled. I have seen so many prayers answered the way I prayed them. It was a blessing. People started recognizing me as the "prayer warrior." The one they wanted praying about the big stuff. It was nice to be recognized. Although I did not intend for this to happen, deep down pride started building up in my heart. I started to trust in the blessings and provisions of God more than God Himself. Something had to be done. God had to teach me and draw me back to Him alone.
This was my too late submission to Pray Mag due to procrastination.

So, stirred by the Holy Spirit and with faith that could move mountains, I prayed that bus prayer. I was a fool in front of the entire bus because God said no that day. A crush to my pride had occurred.
God was not done yet. He had bigger and better things in store. Through this process of healing my hurt, He has deepened my walk with Him as I have learned to trust Him more. He has deepened our relationship and is teaching me to be a better prayer warrior. I am learning to trust His ways no matter what because even when I do not understand His ways are best.

On this side of the healing of my hurt. He has taught me how to pour out my heart like David. He has never ceased to be faithful.

I know can say I fully trust God as God not as anything else. May we will love Him just because of who He is not because of what He can do for us.

Copyright 2009 Refresh My Soul Ministries, Angela Parsley

Transparency

If you get a chance I want you to read this blog. post.

Prayers are appreciated and show some love if you can. This is a pastor that I deeply respect. He is my former pastor. He has always taught transparency and grace. I am thankful for him and what God did in our family while at his church.

Ministry can be so hard. You live in a fish bowl anyway. People judge you often. People misjudge your heart and intentions. When this happens in ministry it is even
more difficult especially in leadership. Though not perfect people expect it. The only perfect example is Jesus and as we behold Him we will love all of those around us more despite the imperfections. Please just show your pastors and other ministry leaders in your life love.

On a personal note the past two years I almost fell completely off the ministry call because I had gotten complained about, misjudged, talked about, gossiped about, and whatever else you can think of. Just because I wanted to help people to love God more. This almost crushed me. Almost made me quite. I fell into a deep pit of bitterness, anger, and depression. God though seemed too far away to get me out was never far. He was always there. He reached down and lifted me out of that pit. He strengthen me, healed me, and set me back on the Rock. I was free. Now I am stronger and know how to pray for others in ministry. It is no joke and not an easy thing. That is why we are to encourage one another DAILY.

I love you all and your support for me. I am forever grateful. You encourage me in ways I cannot even adequately express. Thanks for reading and loving on this ordinary girl who loves God and desires only to make Him known.

Apathy, Lord Break Me

Lately I have been sensing apathy and indifference in my heart. I absolutely hate it. I don't know how or why this creeps in but from time to time it does. I HATE it. I want to live fully for Christ alone. I want to be broken before Him. So I started to pray for Him to break me again. I think God delights in those prayers because they tend to get answered very fast. So this is one of the things He used to break my heart from my foolish pride and apathy.

Compassion international. There is a group there now and Melissa from LPM is one of them. I read her stories of the journey and my heart broke. I felt compassion and real concern and hurt. For $32 dollars a month a child can be sponsored. Seriously that is only 8 mocha's from Starbucks. Seriously how spoiled am I that I even know that. Just pray about what you can do to help others in need. I am especially moved when I read about how mother Theresa lived. We have so much and really do we need it all? What can you do? What will you do? Let's not stay apahtetic and indifferent with what is going on in the world when we can make a difference.

Go and read the stories at the LPM blog you will not regret it.