Being Still

Why is it that difficult for us to just be still before God?

Yesterday I struggled with this more so than most days. I was in the hospital in my lovely gown with holes in it (get the visual here). I am not sick (hospital sick) but I have a test to do so it is procedure. I am rolled down hallways back and forth on this gurney and then parked. Not in a room but in a hallway with lots of other gurney patients waiting like me for various tests. The area is quiet. It is very sad. Most seemed pretty sick. And then there was me.

I wait. My test was scheduled for 10. 10:15,10:30,10:45...I wait. Remember we are in this hallway. The environment is depressing and it seemed not "pc" to talk or laugh. I counted tiles, holes in the ceiling, and various equipment on the wall. I could barely contain myself. Then it hit me. I could be using this time to pray. I could be here for that very purpose to pray for each one sick. I may be the only one praying. So I started looking at people and smiling and praying. One thing I did notice is as people walked past the hallway they tended to avoid eye contact with us gurney patients. I felt convicted because I often do the same. We don't want to see pain or sickness. We want to pretend it is not there. But as much as we want that to be the case there is a time that we have to realize that this is a very temporary life. We were not made to last here in this body. We all have to die. But it is a choice if we really chose to live.

As I sat there I wondered what the lives were like of these people? Who were they? Did they have children? Did they have a family? What are their hobbies? Some things I noticed the staff avoid. They see numbers of gurneys. Another test, another number. Yet, I made sure to be heard. I made sure to remind them that we are people not tests. I was a voice for the ones who didn't have the strength or voice. I cried out to our God the Great Physician. The Great Healer. He is the true healer. He heals as He chooses. It is up to Him. All things are in His hands. We have to hang on and trust. Do we? Are we still enough to listen?